Hi everyone, I am Elaine here. Welcome to Bringing Heaven Home. We have learnt from different speakers in the Bringing Heaven Home team about ‘The World Needs A Father’. And today, our focus will be on Mother.

What about mother? Mother plays an important role in our home too. Not easy but with God’s Help, we can and will be able to fulfil the roles of a mother.

I will be sharing with you all on The Roles of a Mother, and the The 5 Responsibilities of a Mother.

Remember a song that I learnt when I was young that goes like this “世上只有妈妈好……” meaning “Mother is the best in this world”. But, our father is also important. And this is just to affirm our fathers who are here listening.

We know that Father is important in the past sessions with the different speakers who shared in ‘The World Needs A Father’ series. But today, because our focus is on Mother, and I just want to share to all our mothers: we know to be a mother is really not easy. Mother works day and night and have heavy responsibilities on her shoulder.

And because of time, I will limit my sharing today and will look into 5 Responsibilities of a Mother.

The 5 responsibilities of a mother, number one: validating the husband. Imparting intimacy to children. Nurturing and caring for the children. Maintaining social networks for the family and being the primary home-maker. First, Mother needs to Validate the Husband. The focus here is the Father. To honor and respect him. Second, Mother needs to Impart Intimacy to Our Children. And the focus here is our Children. To give them love. Third, Nurturing and Caring for the Children. The focus here is Our Children. To nurture and care for them. Fourth, Mother needs to Maintain a Social Networks for the Family. And lastly, Mother is the Primary Home–Maker.

So here we can see Mother carry many heavy responsibilities in the home to support husband in the family. So children and father, need to appreciate and support our mother too. As children, love our mother as she cares for her children and everyone at home.

The secret in building healthy relationship at home, we must first establish a strong foundation of a husband-and-wife relationship to love one another. And the best gift that the father can give to our children is to love his wife – the mother. This will provide security to children, starting healthy relationship at home.

For women, the secret to loving is the need to feel loved. Especially, coming from husband to love his wife. For men, they need to feel respected. Mother needs to honor and show love and respect to her husband. And once this is established, our home will be filled with love and harmony. This is the secret of Bringing Heaven Home, and it starts with husband and wife.

Now, let’s go to our first point. Validating the Husband. To validate is to visibly and verbally affirm the worth, ability, and relevance of a person. You affirm the value of who they are, and what they are doing. Understanding how to validate your husband effectively is one of the most important ways you can bring heaven into the home.

To have A United Front. The father and mother should be a united together in deciding on the moral environment for the children. Be careful not to critique each other in front of the children.

For example, mother, please do not say anything bad about your husband in front of your children. When a father gives a suggestion to the family that we need to do something; it is always good for the mother to prepare the hearts of our children what is happening, so that the father when gives a suggestion, our children will be ready and say yes and happy to submit the father. This is role of mother, always be there to prepare the hearts of our children to obey and submit to our father as the head of the family.

To be united by the transferal and interpretation of faith. The most important principle of a child to learn is the principle of obedience. Mothers generally have a better sense of the child’s struggles and emotions. Fathers generally have a better bigger picture to focus. Without your validation, the father of your children will always struggle to fulfill his roles properly.

To be united by the transferal and interpretation of accepted values. The father’s role is to confer identity, and that includes the family values. The mother’s role is to translate these values into practical terms.

And be united in affirmation. It is important for father to affirm a child. Mothers must encourage and support this.

Be united in family meetings. Family meetings create a sense of “Our Decision”, not a decision imposed upon us. So if there’s any differences in our views and opinions, it is best for husband and wife to first discuss among themselves and find a common ground before bringing this out to our children. This will shows unity in the heart and mind of parents. And this is also to avoid disagreement and arguments in front of our children.

For mother, always affirm father in front of our children that father’s abilities, good character and values. As a wife, let’s have a willing and cheerful heart to follow and submit our husband. Modelling to our children that Mommy will follow what Daddy says. Daddy is the best. He is our Superhero! For example, in my home, our children can come to me to ask me for things, but I will always tell them that Daddy will always have the final say, whether can or cannot. We need to establish that Daddy is the head of the family. We need to listen and obey. To make the order and the line of authority clear, so that there will be no confusion in the home.

So mother, for us as a wife, we can agree to disagree. But when we agree, let’s do it wholeheartedly and not grudgingly or reluctantly because our children can see it when we agree but still not happy. This is not good way of modeling to our children at all.

As women, we must be very careful not to go against God’s order for the family; we all submit to God and to each other. The husband submits to God, and the wife submits to her husband, and the children submit to their parents. The way a husband leads his wife should empower her and nurture her growth in Christ. He should never make her feel inferior! The Bible is God’s manual for heavenly life!

The father and mother should be on a united front in deciding on the moral environment for the children. We need to be careful not to critique each other in front of our children.

Our children will feel secure when they know that their parents love and respect each other. Dads are the representative of the Father God in the home. The picture of a six-year-old has of a God is based on the one they have of this earthly father. It is understandable that it will affect the child’s faith when the God figure is undermined and criticized on a regular basis. Our children should see unity and mutual respect on this ongoing basis.

The most important principle for a child to learn is the principle of obedience. If they do not learn to obey their parents as the authoritative figures in their lives, they will really find it difficult to obey God when they grow up.

Children learn by watching others, and their primary example of relationship is the one between their mommy and daddy. When they see trust and love expressed, they will model it in their expressions of love to others.

We must form a united front for our children so they can feel safe. Our children feel safe because they know the boundaries in which they may operate.

For today session, we look into the Role of A Mother and one of the Key Responsibility of a Mother is to Validate the Husband and to try to building a United Front. So that we can Bring Heaven Home together in turning the hearts of our children to parents, and parents hearts to our children till our Lord Returns.

In our next session, we will continue on the Roles of a Mother, looking into other responsibilities of a mother. So stay tuned and see you in our next session.

Shalom.